iBeth

Decades Old Mr. Machine Mystery Solved?

For years, my husband has lamented the death of his Mr. Machine.  For those of you unfamiliar with the toy, made by Ideal company's famous inventor Marvin Glass, Mr. Machine was a robot toy that could be taken apart and reassembled. (You can see an animation of Mr. Machine here and some of his most famous inventions here.)  Nostalgia Central notes that

In theory, at least, the $11.95 toy was supposed to teach kids basic mechanical skills.  In reality it taught them life skills that would come in handy years later when trying to repair the family lawn mower or washing machine.

Namely, there's always one part left over when you put it all back together . . .

My husband received the toy one childhood Christmas, and the next day, tragedy!  His brother Mike and his next-door-neighbor Ricky dismantled it and could never get it put together again. His parents searched and searched for a replacement, but because the toy was so popular, they could never find another.

So you can imagine my delight when I saw a reproduction Mr. Machine in a toy catalog last October.  Quickly, I arranged for one to be delivered to my in-laws' house so my husband wouldn't see it.  I rushed to the mailbox every day to confiscate all incoming toy catalogs (no small feat during the pre-Christmas holiday season) so my husband wouldn't know that his long-lamented toy was once again on the market.  I didn't even let the kids in on the secret. 

And Christmas morning, my husband was so thrilled to receive his Mr. Machine that tears came into his eyes.  Finally, the injustice of lo, these many Christmases ago had been righted.  I felt the warm glow of satisfaction.

Recently, my husband reverently opened the box and started Mr. Machine on a merry romp around the room.

And you know what?  Mr. Machine boasts a VERY LOUD bicycle-type bell, a bell that rings CONSTANTLY while Mr. Machine is in motion.  A more tooth-grittingly annoying noise would be hard to imagine.  I ached to disable the thing.  Which started me thinking . . . . .

Mike has never admitted to the dastardly act, at least not in my hearing, and Ricky isn't around to defend himself.  My in-laws "were never able to find another Mr. Machine," even though they claim to have searched diligently, even though it was a "hot" toy that season.  The toy is guaranteed to drive any adult insane.  Hmmmmmm.  Maybe that original Mr. Machine didn't fall victim to Mike and Ricky after all.  Maybe he was a victim of [dramatic music plays] parental foul play!

A jury of their peers would never convict them.

Growing Pains

The school called this morning.  Emma had complained to her teacher that her "parts really hurt."  The teacher immediately sent her to the nurse, who wasn't about to poke around down there, so I left work to get her. 

Emma had been fine when I dropped her off 90 minutes earlier, and she didn't have a fever when I picked her up.  Hmmm.  I plopped her into a sitz bath and checked her out while her daddy called the doctor.  She looked fine, not much redness anywhere.  Hmmm.  As I anointed her with clotrimazole cream, she exclaimed, "Not there, Mom--over here!" and pointed to the top of one thigh.

The problem?  Her underpants were too small.

I have plenty to say . . .

But so much of what I would say can't be said in a non-anonymous blog!  Very frustrating. Still, I will be back to regular posting pretty soon.  Please don't give up on me.

A 2yo Tells Time

"What time is it, Amelia?" daddy asked her.   

She looked at the clock.  "It's E - E - O - 1."

It was 10:33.